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How to judge the behavior of my fiancé?

Dr. Yasir Bakkar

Published On: 20/12/2016 A.D. - 20/3/1438 H. Visited: 7651 times

Question

I had a situation with my fiancé and I would like to consult you about it: The cousin of my fiancé's mother died. My fiancé asked me: What shall you wear during the funeral? I said to him: I shall wear a black dress. He answered me: Do not wear a black dress, but wear a red one.

It was strange to hear this, so I said to him: This is not proper, and why is this in the first place? He said to me: My father has a cancer and your black dress is a bad omen for him.

I said to myself: How could he have such mentality while he is an educated person and his age is 33.

Answer

Dear sister, you are always welcomed in Alukah.

Take these minor situation as a key to the general image which you should form about your fiancé in order to take that important step to marriage, but I warn you of two matters:

1- To accept him to escape a certain social status such as problems at home or because you are getting old.

2- To accept him because of menopause and the lack of grooms.

In both cases, results are usually painful; I met many girls whose rushing and unstudied decision made them pay the price.

I cannot judge your fiancé, but as I told you before: Seek the counsel of your wise people of your family, ask Allah for good choice, and Allah shall guide you with His Mercy to the best of the world and the Hereafter.

You are always welcomed in Alukah.

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