Usurping the Rights of In-laws

They nurture and bring up their daughter and then hand over her to you.  It should not be that after they made all the effort to bring her up now you scold at them as though they have no right over their daughter. For small and trivial matters, you fight with your in-laws. You regard them as lowly.  If your mother-in-law  falls  ill  and she requests,  “Please,   allow   my daughter to stay  for two  more  days,  she  will  serve  me,”  then you  reply,  “I have  a right  over  her. Now I own her. I will catch hold of her ears and take her away.” O ignoramus! Fear Allah Ta'ala. Such a time may come over you.  Ali Qari (Rahmatullah Alaihe) said,   “Allah   Ta’ala has   stated in the Quran Karim refers to one’s family relations and refers to one’s wife’s relations. Allah Ta'ala has conjuncted them.  The ruling of the Ma’tuf and Ma’tuf Alai (the two words conjuncted) is one e.g., “Zaid came and Khalid came.” Coming is found equally in both.  Under this  verse,  Ali  Qari (Rahmatullah Alaihe)  said the same  thing  which  Allamah Alusi (Rahmatullah Alaihe)  said,  “The rights  which  one’s own  family relations  have,  the wife’s   relations  also   have.”    It   is   not permissible to fight and quarrel with them on small and pretty issues.  This is Haraam and a major sin. Therefore, if one’s son takes  his wife to her  family’s home to fulfill their rights  on the days  of Eid or any  other day,  then  it is not  permissible for the mother to say,  “You  are  now  the slave  of your  wife,”  and  it is not  permissible for  the  father  to  say,  “You  have  now  become your wife’s porter.” What an ignorant speech. The age of ignorance is here.

Friends! This is great ignorance, lack of knowledge and lack of mercy. They    should actually congratulate you saying, “Go, and fulfill the rights of your in- law.  They too have a right.” After  bringing her  up  for fifteen years,  and  then  handing her  over  to you,  is it not  her  right  to visit her parents? If you have your daughter, will you be happy if her in-laws do not allow her to meet you?  However, for another person’s daughter, you want to rule her and make her your servant. As I was saying,   in these matters, parents are today well exceeding the limits.  The poor son is pious and Allah-wala.  If he has to be cordial to his wife,   his mother becomes angry. This poor person is without fault.  Then too he catches hold of his mother’s feet and pleads, “mother, forgive me.” In spite of being a mother, she says, “No, I will not forgive you.  Don’t even accompany my janazah.” All this is loads of ignorance.

Fear Allah.  If you do not forgive, Allah Ta'ala will not forgive you on the Day of Judgment. Then you will come to know. The Ulama have written that the person who forgives the faults of people on earth, on the Day of Judgment, Allah Ta'ala will forgive his sins.