My husband detains me at home, should I ask for Khul` (divorcing one's wife in return of money (which she pays))?

All praise be to Allah, and peace be upon the Messenger of Allah, upon his family, his Companions, and those who follow him.

The general rule of Nushuz (disobedience of a wife to her husband) is showing haughtiness over the husband and not obeying him in things which she must obey him.

Hence, leaving the husband's house without permission is a type of Nushuz, but your husband's detention to you for one year and six months and depriving you of talking to your family contain a great harm that justifies your escape from the house. This is not true Nushuz but it is escape from harm.

As for asking for divorce due to harm, it is not prohibited, but the wife is prohibited to ask for divorce without need as the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "Any woman asks her husband for a divorce when it is not absolutely necessary, the fragrance of Paradise will be forbidden to her." [Reported by Ahmad].

Likewise, asking for Khul` is permitted by scholars when she feels the harm of her husband. Ibn Qudamah (may Allah bestow mercy on his soul) said: In short, when a wife hates her husband for his bad manners, bad facial appearance, weak faith, old age, weakness, or suchlike and she fears not to fulfill the duties ordained by Allah on her regarding her husband, she is permitted to ask for Khul` for a compensation to free herself. Allah says: "Then if you fear that they would not be able to keep the limits ordained by Allâh, then there is no sin on either of them if she gives back (the Mahr or a part of it) for her Al Khul` (divorce)." [Surat Al Baqarah: 229].

The Shaykh of Islam Ibn Taymiyah said in Majmu` Al Fatawa: (32/ 282): "Al Khul` which was reported in the Qur'an and the Sunnah is ascertained when a wife hates her husband and wants to leave him, then she gives him the dowry or part of it as a ransom for herself such as a captive ransoms himself. However, if each one of them wants to continue marriage with his mate, such Khul` is innovated in Islam. Ibn Taymiyah (may Allah show mercy to him) said: If she hates him and chooses not to live with him, she may ransom herself by paying back his dowry for her freedom and she must be divorced according to the Qur'an and the Sunnah and as agreed upon among scholars."

If your husband forces you to ask for Khul`, you should not obey him in that as it is mere oppression, which is not permissible for him. Allah (may He be Exalted) prohibited man to force a woman to give him some dowry. Allah (may He be Exalted) says: "O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will; and you should not treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the Mahr you have given them, unless they commit open Fahishah (illegal sexual intercourse or disobey their husbands); and live with them honourably. If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allâh brings through it a great deal of good." [Surat An-Nisa': 19] until He says: "But if you intend to replace a wife by another and you have given one of them a Qintâr (of gold i.e. a great amount as Mahr) take not the least bit of it back; would you take it wrongfully without a right and (with) a manifest sin? * And how could you take it (back) while you have gone in unto each other, and they have taken from you a firm and strong covenant?" [Surat An-Nisa': 20 - 21].

Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "And it is not lawful for you (men) to take back (from your wives) any of your Mahr (bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage) which you have given them." [Surat Al Baqarah: 229].

The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "If he cohabits with her then for her is the dower with which her immodesty is turned lawful." [Reported by At-Tirmidhy].

As for forcing you to do anything, it removes your free will and your choice and there is no sin on you to ask for Khul` in that case because it is not prohibited.

My advice to you, dear Muslim sister, is not to hasten things up, and you should mediate righteous people in between to draw your points of view closer perhaps things did not reach that stage of divorce.

I hope Allah would reform things between you, fix your conditions, and destines goodness for you both.