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Maintaining the ties of kinship

Dr. Amin ibn `Abdullah Ash-Shaqawy

Published On: 1/11/2016 A.D. - 30/1/1438 H. Visited: 18422 times

Maintaining the ties of kinship Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds [i.e., people]. Peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad, his family, and all his Companions. I bear witness that there is no god but Allah alone who has no partner and that Muhammad is His Servant and Messenger. One of the dearest acts of worship, righteous deeds, the highest in ranks, the greatest in blessing, and the more beneficial in the world as well as in the Hereafter is maintaining the ties of worship. Kinship are the relatives of a person such as his parents, his son, his daughter, his sister, his brother, and all his paternal or maternal relatives. The relatives of the wife or the husband are not included because they are not relatives but they are close by marriage relationship. Allah (Glory be to Him) says: And those who believed afterwards, and emigrated and strove hard along with you (in the Cause of Allâh), they are of you. But kindred by blood are nearer to one another (regarding inheritance) in the decree ordained by Allâh. Verily, Allâh is All-Knower of everything.[Surat Al Anfal: 75]. Allah (Glory be to Him) commended people to maintain the ties of kinship and made the command of maintaining the ties of kinship correlated with the command of piety. Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "And fear Allâh through Whom you demand (your mutual rights), and (do not cut the relations of) the wombs (kinship). Surely, Allâh is Ever an All-Watcher over you."[Surat An-Nisa': 1]. It means to fear Allah by adhering to His Obedience and leaving out His disobedience, and beware not to cut these ties but preserve them as Ibn `Abbas said. Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "So give to the kindred his due, and to Al-Miskîn (the needy) and to the wayfarer. That is best for those who seek Allâh's Countenance; and it is they who will be successful."[Surat Ar-Rum: 38]. He (Glory be to Him) explained that maintaining the ties of kinship is a duty that should be done whether financially or morally. The call for maintaining the ties of kinship was one of the first things which the Prophet (peace be upon him) called for at the beginning of his mission. It was authentically reported in Sahih Al Bukhari and Sahih Muslim in the story of Abu Sufyan with Heraclius when he asked Abu Sufyan: What are his commands to you [he means the commands of the Prophet]? Abu Sufyan said: He commands us to worship Allah alone without associating partners with Him in worship, leave out the commands of your fathers, and commands us to offer Salah, be truthful, be chaste, and maintain the ties of kinship. [1] Maintaining the ties of kinship is a reason for spreading sustenance and prolonging lifetime in the world, winning Paradise, and escaping Hell-Fire. It was authentically reported in Sahih Al Bukhari and Sahih Muslim on the authority of Abu Ayyub Al Ansary (may Allah be pleased with him) once during the journey of the Prophet (may peace of Allah be upon him) a bedouin appeared before him and caught hold of the nose-string of his she-camel and then said, Messenger of Allah (or Muhammad), inform me about that which takes me near to Paradise and draws me away from the Fire (of Hell). He (the narrator) said: The Prophet (may peace and blessings be upon him) stopped for a while and cast a glance upon his companions and then said: He was afforded a good opportunity (or he had been guided well). He (the Prophet) addressing the bedouin said: (Repeat) whatever you have uttered. He (the bedouin) repeated that. Upon this the Prophet (may peace and blessings be upon him) remarked: The deed which can draw you near to Paradise and take you away from Hell is, that you worship Allah and associate none with Him, and you establish prayer and pay Zakat, and do good to your kin. After having uttered these words, the Prophet asked the bedouin to release the nose-string of his she-camel.[2] In a narration the Prophet said: "If he abides by the Prophet's command, he shall enter Paradise."[3] It was authentically reported in Sahih Al Bukhari and Sahih Muslim from the Hadith of Anas ibn Malik that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Whoever loves that he be granted more wealth and that his lease of life be prolonged then he should keep good relations with his Kith and kin."[4] Cutting the ties of kinship is one of the major sins which Allah warned the doers with severe and immediate punishment in the world in addition to the torment of the Hereafter. Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "And those who break the Covenant of Allâh, after its ratification, and sever that which Allâh has commanded to be joined (i.e. they sever the bond of kinship and are not good to their relatives), and work mischief in the land, on them is the curse (i.e. they will be far away from Allâh's Mercy), and for them is the unhappy (evil) home (i.e. Hell)."[Surat Ar-Ra`d: 25]. Al Bukhari and Muslim reported in their Sahih from the Hadith of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Allah created the creations, and when He finished from His creations, Ar-Rahm i.e., womb said, "(O Allah) at this place I seek refuge with You from all those who sever me (i.e. sever the ties of kith and kin). Allah said, 'Yes, won't you be pleased that I will keep good relations with the one who will keep good relations with you, and I will sever the relation with the one who will sever the relations with you.' It said, 'Yes, O my Lord.' Allah said, 'Then that is for you ' " Allah's Messenger (peace be upon him) added: "Read (in the Qur'an) if you wish, the Statement of Allah: 'Would you then, if you were given the authority, do mischief in the land and sever your ties of kinship?[Surat Muhammad:22]."[5] Imam At-Tirmidhy reported in his Sunan from the Hadith of Abu Bakrah (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Alllah (peace be upon him) said: "There is no wrong action more likely to bring punishment in this world in addition to what is stored up in the Next World than oppression and severing ties of kinship." [6] The one who cuts the ties of kinship is threatened not to enter Paradise. It was reported in Sahih Al Bukhari and Muslim from the Hadith of Jubayr ibn Mut`im that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "The person who severs the bond of kinship will not enter Paradise."[7] A good man is the one who maintains the ties of kinship. Al Bukhari reported in his Sahih from the Hadith of `Abdullah in `Amr ibn Al `As (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Al-Wasil is not the one who recompenses the good done to him by his relatives, but Al-Wasil is the one who keeps good relations with those relatives who had severed the bond of kinship with him."[8] Imam Muslim reported in his Sahih from the Hadith of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) that aman said to the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him): "I have relatives with whom I try to keep the ties of relationship but they sever relations with me; and whom I treat kindly but they treat me badly, I am gentle with them but they are rough to me.'' He (peace be upon him) replied, "If you are as you say: it is as if you are feeding them hot ashes, and you will be with a supporter against them from Allah as long as you continue to do so." [9]

Commentators of the Hadith said: The meaning is that you feed them hot ashes which is a metaphor showing the great sin they commit, whereas there is no sin on the one who maintains the ties of kinship. Maintaining the ties of kinship has different types. Ibn Abu Jamrah said: "Maintaining the ties of kinship may be done by money, help, warding off harm, smiling upon meeting your kin, and by invocation." Al Qurtuby said: Maintaining the ties of kinship should be done by intimacy, advice, justice, fulfilling their due rights, spending on relatives, checking their conditions, and neglecting their faults. The meaning of maintaining good relationship with kin is to deliver good and ward off evil as much as possible and according to one's own capacity. Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "Allâh burdens not a person beyond his scope."[Surat Al Baqarah: 286]. Imam An-Nawawy said: Our scholars said: It is desirable to advance the mother to the father then children then grandfathers and grandmothers then brothers and sisters then the rest of kin such as paternal uncles and aunts then maternal uncles and aunts then the nearest and the nearest [10]...etc. Al Hakim reported in his Mustadrak from the Hadith of Abu Ramthah (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah said: "Be kind to your mother and father, your sister and brother then the nearest then the nearest." [11] Charity to relatives is doubled for its giver. At-Tirmidhy reported in his Sunan from the Hadith of Salman ibn `Amir that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "Charity towards a poor person is charity, and towards a relation is both charity and maintaining the ties (of kinship)."[12] Al Bukhari and Muslim reported on the authority Maymunah bint Al Harith manumitted a slave-girl without taking the permission of the Prophet (peace be upon him). On the day when it was her turn to be with the Prophet (peace be upon him), she said, "Do you know, O Allah's Messenger, that I have manumitted my slave-girl?" He said, "Have you really?" She replied in the affirmative. He said, "You would have got more reward if you had given her (i.e. the slave-girl) to one of your maternal uncles." Praise be to Allah, the lord of the worlds, and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad, his family, and his Companions.[13]