I did not know that I have an appointment with him.
That day was a regular day like the rest and its moments were going naturally until I arrived with my sister at the mall to buy some stuff. Since that moment everything has changed in my life, but my entire life was turned upside down when I saw him.
When I saw him, O my God, his looks, shape, clothes, everything, I thought that he was smiling at me.
Then, I realized from the first sight that he was the one for whom I was looking.
I did not know that I was looking for him except after I had seen him. At first sight, my limbs were frozen and I stood there amazed.
I felt that my heart beats were hasting as if all around me were hearing them.
My heart went far away to a place I do not know.
I do not know why I felt that way for him?! He must be the one. Yes, this is the true love about which I was hearing, I must have grown up and my feelings have developed.
Something was happening inside me. It was not possible to leave the situation pass like this without thinking about.
I must make him feel my love.
Wait, O precious!
Is it possible to fall in love at first sight?!
Nay, by Allah, it is just a trick or insinuation from Satan which adorns that man to you and you see him as the most perfect and the best elegant of all.
Know that there is nothing called love at first sight.
Know that it is the beginning of the end.
What you have felt was just an admiration with the outer appearance which has nothing to do with the core or with the inner-self.
Dear sister, the media adorns is trying to promote inside you the notion of love at first sight which is totally not true.
You liked the outer appearance and because you have released your sights, your imaginations and dreams were formed in few seconds.
Therefore, the lie, which they call "love at first sight," was thought to be true.
Know that most of these marriages which are done after love stories do not succeed because each of the spouses has depicted an image in his or her imagination for the other whom he or she saw at first time and decided that this is the true love for which he or she was looking.
Afterwards, he or she finds out the reality and the image changes to the opposite, thus both shall be frustrated and feel that they were running after a mirage.
Perhaps you are saying: If he is not the future husband, what is the hindrance which stops me from living with my emotions and enjoy them?! I did not do something wrong: I did not speak to him, I did not meet him in privacy, and they were just looks and innocent feelings.
I say to you: Shall you be happy if the people know about your relationship?
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Virtue is noble behavior, and sin is that which creates doubt and you do not like people to know about it." [Reported by Muslim].
Listen to your Prophet (peace be upon him) in his great advice: "Do not follow the look with another because the first sight is for you [to figure out the shape before you], but the second [which will be deliberate] shall be against you."
What is the first sight?
Is it the look which a person does for minutes, seconds, or others?
No, my dear. The first sight is the look which is done unintentionally and a person tries to direct his sight away as much as possible, then he directs his sight away from the forbidden scene.
Be sure that if you have done that, you shall not be tired of these lies with Allah's Willing. Even if Satan adorns the whole matter to you, you shall forget the entire matter easily as long as you depend on Allah in all your matters.
My sincere advice to you is to follow the following steps:
• Fill your heart with the love of Allah where nothing else fills your heart.
• Lower your gaze because the matter is not difficult. Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, Allâh is Well-Acquainted with what they do * And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts) and not to show off their adornment except only that which is apparent (like both eyes for necessity to see the way, or outer palms of hands or one eye or dress like veil, gloves, head-cover, apron, etc.)." [Surat An-Nur: 30-31].
• Keeping away from reading stories and novels which speak about love and sink their readers in these illusions until he feels like living them in reality. Do not follow the Internet sites which are interested in these issues.
• Rearing the girl righteously, strengthening her faith, warning her against the temptations of Satan during the puberty age and at the beginning of youth period, and protecting her before being a prey for this illusion because prevention is better than cure.
• Filling the time with useful matters because free time may lead to falling in unlawful matters. Knowing the importance of time and how to maintain it.
• Avoid going to public places in which young men and women are mixed.
• Observing the fast. The Prophet (peace be upon him) instructed the people by his saying: "He who can afford to marry should marry, because it will help him refrain from looking at other women, and save his private parts from looking at other women, and save his private parts from committing illegal sexual relation; and he who cannot afford to marry is advised to fast, as fasting will diminish his sexual power."
• Pondering over the biography of righteous women and their conditions.
• Knowing the conditions of lewd women and their bad end.
• Choosing a righteous company to spend time with to help one another for obedience because man is weak by himself but strong with his brethren; and wolf only eats the straying sheep.
I remind you of Allah's Saying: "O you who believe! Follow not the footsteps of Shaitân (Satan). And whosoever follows the footsteps of Shaitân (Satan), then, verily he commands Al Fahshâ' [i.e. to commit indecency (illegal sexual intercourse, etc.)], and Al Munkar [disbelief and polytheism (i.e. to do evil and wicked deeds; to speak or to do what is forbidden in Islâm, etc.)]. And had it not been for the Grace of Allâh and His Mercy on you, not one of you would ever have been pure from sins. But Allah purifies (guides to Islâm) whom He wills, and Allâh is All-Hearer, All-Knower." [Surat An-Nur: 21].
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