Islam Cares For The Woman As A Mother (1/3)

We note that the Glorious Qur’an greatly emphasized the right of the woman as a mother. In fact, Allah (Glorified and Exalted be He), stated in the Glorious Qur’an (Surah Al-Isra’, 17:23) which the meaning of is translated as: “Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him; and that you be dutiful, kind, and caring to your parents. If one of them or both attains old age in your life, say not to them a word of faintest complaint or disrespect, nor shout at them; but address them in terms of honor.” Allah, in this verse puts His right to be worshipped along with the right of parents, in the same address and at the same level. This displays the great rights and position of parents in Islam.

Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) declared that: “Paradise is under the mother's feet.”[1] No doubt this is a symbolic representation of the fact that the pleasure, caring, respecting and serving the mother will definitely lead man to attain the pleasure of Allah and Paradise, which He promised as a reward for His rightly guided Muslim believers.

Mothers, in the first place, before fathers, deserve kindness, caring, good treatment, kind company and best care and service from their children. Abu-Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him), was reported as saying: “A man came to Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), and asked him: 'O Prophet of Allah! Who is the most deserving and worthy of my good company and care?' Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), responded: 'It is your mother.' The man asked: 'Who comes next after her?' He (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: 'Your mother.' Again, the man asked: 'Who comes next after her?' He (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), said: 'Your mother', The man asked again: 'Who comes next after her?' He (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), said: 'Your father’.”[2]

This Hadith indicates that a mother has three times the rights that of a father in accordance with Islam. This entitlement is given to the mother due to the tremendous suffering that she goes through during the various stages of the life of her child, in pregnancy, delivery, nursing as well as the shared responsibility of raising the child. The fetus lives, nourishes and thrives on the account of the mother's digested food while in his mother's womb for nine months. Similarly, the nursing baby does the same for two years of his life, if the mother decides to breast-feed her child. This has been illustrated by Allah (Glorified and Exalted be He), as stated in the Glorious Qur’an (Surah Luqmqn, 31:14) which the meaning of is translated as: “And We have enjoined on man to be dutiful and good to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness and hardship upon weakness and hardship; his weaning is two years. Offer Me thanks and to your parents; unto Me is the final destination.”

Mothers, therefore, are given priority over fathers, and anybody else for that matter, in terms of being kind, caring, dutiful, mindful, good, obedient and helping.

Both parents, in accordance to Islamic teachings and principles, are to be obeyed, respected and not differed with as long as they do not command or order their children to disobey their Creator, Allah (Glorified and Exalted be He). If parents ordered their children to perform any act of disobedience to Allah, in any form, shape or size, then they are to be disobeyed in that particular aspect of practice only. In the meantime, a son/daughter must continue to present their normal duties towards parents; they are expected to serve them, help them in their worldly affairs, come to their rescue when they need them. Allah (Glorified and Exalted be He), stated in the Glorious Qur’an (Surah Luqman, 31:15) which the meaning of is translated as: “And if parents strive with you to make you join in worship with Me others that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not, but behave with them in the world kindly, and follow the path of him who turns to Me in repentance and obedience. Then to Me will be your return, and I shall tell you what you did throughout your life.”

Obedience to parents must be given priority over all others including the wife. This means, that by no means the wife is to be humiliated, insulted, tortured or otherwise. Each individual must be given his/her due right of respect and obedience accordingly; however, parents should be given priority in obedience over all others.

Allah's pleasure with man is but an indication of the pleasure of the parents with their son/daughter, and vice versa. His dismay, wrath and displeasure is due to occur as a result of dismaying, displeasing or humiliating one's parents. Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Allah's pleasure with man is but an indication of the pleasure of the parents with their son/daughter, and vice versa. His dismay, wrath and displeasure is due to occur to man as a result of dismaying, displeasing or humiliating one's parents.”[3]

Caring for parents, being good and kind to them, pleasing them and taking care of their immediate needs, especially in old age is preferred over participating actively and involving physically in the various acts of Jihad, striving for the cause of Allah. Unless every Muslim, male and female, is compelled to take an active part in Jihad activities, the care for parents is given utmost priority in accordance with Islam. Ibn Masaud (may Allah be pleased with him), reported: “I asked Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him): O Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) What is the most liked act in the sight of Allah? Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Offering the prayer in its accurate due time.” I, the reporter of the Hadith, further asked: What comes next, O Prophet of Allah? Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Being good, kind, respectful, obedient and caring to your parents.” I, the reporter of the Hadith, further asked: What comes next, O Prophet of Allah? The Prophet said: “Striving, Jihad, for the cause of Allah.”[4]

Abdullah bin 'Amr bin al-'Aas (may Allah be pleased with him), also reported: “A man came to Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and said to him: O Prophet of Allah! I shall give you my pledge of allegiance to migrate and strive in the cause of Allah seeking His reward only. Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) upon hearing that asked the man: “Are your parents alive?” The man said: Yes, O Prophet of Allah, both of them is living. Allah's Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “If you seek the pleasure and reward from Allah go back to your parents and make sure that you do the best you can to serve them, please them, take care of their needs especially at the old age and be good and kind to them.”[5]

(Continued)