Problems of my parents

My beloved, welcome to Alukah Website.

I am pleased with your questions, feeling responsibility toward your parents, and your eagerness to the stability of the family. May Allah bless you!

For every behavior, there is a hidden cause that pushes it forward to appear.

However, you did not mention the reasons which made your father behave like that, therefore I shall put some probabilities for the mentioned problems:

As for not fixing the broken equipments at home:

He may refrain because he is busy.

He passes by a financial crisis.

Your mother does not ask him properly.

As for cruelty:

Was he reared harshly in young age, therefore he treats you like this?

Does he pass by some problems which make his mood bad.

Because of his frequent works.

Because he did not learn how to express himself.

As for the relationship between your father and mother:

Why does he refrain from talking to her?

Does she ask too much?

She does not pay attention to his free time and work?

something else?

Of course, there are some reasons for his behavior and what I have mentioned were just probabilities that perhaps come near the truth. To answer this accurately I had to know the reason; and you are the best people who can answer these question by your knowledge.

However, the perfect solution is to sit with your father and speak to him about your feelings and tell him that you feel pain from the bad relationship between him and the mother. Ask him: What does bother you so as to avoid it?

What is bothering you regarding our mother?

Why do you treat us harshly?

Send him a message if it is hard to address him directly and express to him your love and eagerness to the stability of the family and overcoming problems.

Speak to your mother too or send her a message, expressing your love to her and your eagerness to the stability of the family and continuation of her relationship with your father in a good manner.

Ask her to calm down and understand the reasons which push your father to behave like this and ask her to be lenient, observe patience, and behave well in case he did not answer her calls.

She should offer love and kindness and continue to give because giving leads at the end to gain the inclination of the father, then she will respond and listen to you and your conditions shall be good by the will of Allah.

All homes pass by crises, but they overcome them by more patience, well-thinking, and experience.

I am waiting for a comfortable message from you telling me that your conditions have become good. May Allah guide you to behave well!