Marriage in the Glorious Qur'an

Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds [i.e., people], and peace be upon the trustworthy Prophet, our Prophet Muhammad, upon his family, and upon all his Companions.

Allah (may He be Exalted) created the universe and made therein various laws, and of these laws is marriage which is not limited to something without the other but includes all creatures. Allah (may He be Exalted) stressed this law in many Ayahs. As for the law in animals, Allah (may He be Exalted) says: "Eight pairs: of the sheep two (male and female), and of the goats two (male and female). Say: Has He forbidden the two males or the two females, or (the young) which the wombs of the two females enclose? Inform me with knowledge if you are truthful." [Surat Al An`am: 143]. As for plants, Allah says: "And it is He Who spread out the earth, and placed therein firm mountains and rivers and of every kind of fruits He made Zawjain Ithnain (two in pairs - may mean two kinds or it may mean: of two varieties, e.g. black and white, sweet and sour, small and big). He brings the night as a cover over the day. Verily, in these things, there are Ayât (proofs, evidences, lessons, signs, etc.) for a people who reflect." [Surat Ar-Ra`d: 3]. And Allah's Saying: "Who has made earth for you like a bed (spread out); and has opened roads (ways and paths) for you therein, and has sent down water (rain) from the sky. And We have brought forth with it various kinds of vegetation." [Surat Taha: 53]. And Allah's Saying: "Do they not observe the earth - how much of every good kind We cause to grow therein?" [Surat Ash-Shu`ara': 7]. Moreover, Allah (may He be Glorified and Exalted) mentioned that wedlock is one of Allah's Laws. Allah (may He be Exalted) says: "Glorified is He Who has created all the pairs of that which the earth produces, as well as of their own (human) kind (male and female), and of that which they know not." [Surat Yasin: 36]. Allah (Exalted be He) says: "And of everything We have created pairs, that you may remember (the Grace of Allâh)." [Surat Az-Zariyat: 49]. Imam Ibn Kathir (may said Allah be merciful with him) said: "Allah created all creatures in pairs: Sky and earth, night and day, sun and moon, land and water, light and darkness, belief and apostasy, death and life, misery and happiness, Paradise and Hell, even animals and plants." Therefore, Allah says: "That you may remember" [Surat Az-Zariyat: 49]. That is to know that the Creator is one who has no partner.

Likewise, Allah created man in pairs as He says: "O mankind! Be dutiful to your Lord, Who created you from a single person (Adam), and from him (Adam) He created his wife [Hawwâ' (Eve)], and from them both He created many men and women." [Surat An-Nisa': 1]. And Allah's Saying: "And that He (Allâh) creates the pairs, male and female," [Surat An-Najm: 45].

One of the requisites of wedlock is the meeting of male and female to achieve the responsibilities of wedlock after signing the marriage contract. The Glorious Qur'an exhorted to marriage in many Ayahs. Sometimes, it comes in the form of "order" as in Allah's Saying: "And marry those among you who are single (i.e. a man who has no wife and the woman who has no husband) and (also marry) the Sâlihûn (pious, fit and capable ones) of your (male) slaves and maid-servants (female slaves). If they be poor, Allâh will enrich them out of His Bounty. And Allâh is All-Sufficient for His creatures' needs, All-Knowing (about the state of the people)." [Surat An-Nur: 32]. And sometimes, He describes a wife with dwelling as in Allah's Saying: "It is He Who has created you from a single person (Adam), and (then) He has created from him his wife [Hawwâ' (Eve)], in order that he might enjoy the pleasure of living with her [dwelling]." [Surat Al A`raf: 189]. Allah (Glory be to Him) mentioned that He placed between the spouses intimacy and mercy as in Allah's Saying: "And among His Signs is that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy." [Surat Ar-Rum: 21]. In this meaning, Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "They are Lîbas [i.e. body cover, or screen, or Sakan, (i.e. you enjoy the pleasure of living with her - as in Verse 7:189) Tafsir At-Tabarî], for you and you are the same for them." [Surat Al Baqarah: 187]. Therefore, it was said: "There is no intimacy between two souls greater than the relationship between spouses."

Sometimes, the Glorious Qur'an mentioned the Prophets of Allah (peace be upon them) and that He granted them wives and offsprings. Allah (may He be Exalted) says: "And indeed We sent Messengers before you (O Muhammad peace be upon him), and made for them wives and offspring." [Surat Ar-Ra`d: 38]. So, wedlock is one of Allah's Signs as He explained in His Glorious Book, Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "And among His Signs is that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy. Verily, in that are indeed signs for a people who reflect." [Surat Ar-Rum: 21]. It is fitting to ponder over wedlock and the great wisdom of Allah behind it because after signing the marriage contract, a woman leaves her parents, brethren, and all her family and moves to the companionship of a strange man with whom she will share better and worse and share intimacy, love, and mercy which is stronger than any bond between relatives; so glory be to Allah, the All-Wise, the All-Knowing.

Due to the importance of this relationship, the Wise Lawgiver did not leave out this relationship without direction and explanation to each party what should they do along with explaining their rights and the causes for their happiness. Moreover, it was mentioned in the Shari`ah the explanation of these rights and duties of both parties so that it would not deviate from the course. There is no doubt that the deviation of the family from the right course causes disruption to society because society is composed from a group of families.

Because of the important position of marital relationship, it was mentioned in the Shari`ah a full explanation to the rules that organize the family and its individuals.[1] The one who ponders over the Ayahs of the Glorious Qur'an finds that the Glorious Qur'an cared much for marital relationship and its rulings and the stages of family formation are organized by divine instructions. If we review the Ayahs of the Qur'an that are speaking about organizing rulings and codes to the family and its individuals, but here I shall mention a small part of them. As for betrothal, the Qur'an says: "And there is no sin on you if you make a hint of betrothal to women" [Surat Al Baqarah: 235].

The Glorious Qur'an detailed the women who are forbidden to marry, Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "And marry not women whom your fathers married, except what has already passed; indeed it was shameful and most hateful, and an evil way. * Forbidden to you (for marriage) are: your mothers, your daughters, your sisters, your father's sisters, your mother's sisters, your brother's daughters, your sister's daughters, your foster mothers who gave you suck, your foster milk suckling sisters, your wives' mothers, your step-daughters under your guardianship, born of your wives to whom you have gone in, but there is no sin on you if you have not gone in them (to marry their daughters), the wives of your sons who (spring) from your own loins, and two sisters in wedlock at the same time, except for what has already passed; verily, Allâh is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." [Surat An-Nisa': 22 - 23]. The Glorious Qur'an spoke about the number of women who are permissible for man to marry, Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan-girls, then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (the slaves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice." [Surat An-Nisa': 3].

The Glorious Qur'an confirmed the strength of the marriage contract and its sublime status, Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "And how could you take it (back) while you have gone in unto each other, and they have taken from you a firm and strong covenant?" [Surat An-Nisa': 21]. The Glorious Qur'an described the marriage contract with a strong covenant because of its power and greatness. Furthermore, the Glorious Qur'an explained the rights and duties resulting from this contract for each of the spouses. Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them." [Surat Al Baqarah: 228]. This is a great rule in the nature of duties and rights of the spouses.

The Glorious Qur'an exhorts husbands to kind treatment with their wives even if there are no full intimacy and sincere love. Allah (may He be Exalted) says: "And live with them honorably. If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allâh brings through it a great deal of good." [Surat An-Nisa': 19]. Allah (may He be Exalted) commanded a husband to treat his wife kindly or divorce her nicely. Allah (may He be Exalted) says: "The divorce is twice, after that, either you retain her on reasonable terms or release her with kindness." [Surat Al Baqarah: 229]. The Glorious Qur'an explained a set of duties on the husband, of which is the right of a wife to have expenditure and dwelling. Allah (may He be Exalted) says: "Lodge them (the divorced women) where you dwell." [Surat At-Talaq: 6]. Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "Let the rich man spend according to his means." [Surat At-Talaq: 7]. The Glorious Qur'an also forbade harming a wife in Allah's Saying: "And do not harm them so as to straiten them (that they be obliged to leave your house)." [Surat At-Talaq: 6]. And His saying: "But if they obey you, seek not against them means (of annoyance)." [Surat An-Nisa': 34]. The Glorious Qur'an explained the permissibility of reconciliation and giving up some rights for combining people and preventing separation. Allah (may He be Exalted) says: "And if a woman fears cruelty or desertion on her husband's part, there is no sin on them both if they make terms of peace between themselves; and making peace is better. And human inner-selves are swayed by greed. But if you do good and keep away from evil, verily, Allâh is Ever Well-Acquainted with what you do." [Surat An-Nisa': 128].

If the conditions between the spouses are hot and about to develop to separation, the Glorious Qur'an commanded them to send two wise judges from each party to reconcile things in between. Allah (may He be Exalted) says: "If you fear a breach between them twain (the man and his wife), appoint (two) arbitrators, one from his family and the other from hers; if they both wish for peace, Allâh will cause their reconciliation. Indeed Allâh is Ever All-Knower, Well-Acquainted with all things." [Surat An-Nisa': 35]. When it is impossible to live with one another and a husband intends to divorce, the Glorious Qur'an explained the important rulings of divorce, commended them, and warned against transgressing them. Allah (may He be Exalted) says: "The divorce is twice, after that, either you retain her on reasonable terms or release her with kindness. And it is not lawful for you (men) to take back (from your wives) any of your Mahr (bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at the time of marriage) which you have given them, except when both parties fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by Allâh (e.g. to deal with each other on a fair basis). * Then if you fear that they would not be able to keep the limits ordained by Allâh, then there is no sin on either of them if she gives back (the Mahr or a part of it) for her Al Khul` (divorce). These are the limits ordained by Allâh, so do not transgress them. And whoever transgresses the limits ordained by Allâh, then such are the Zâlimûn (wrong-doers). * And if he has divorced her (the third time), then she is not lawful to him thereafter until she has married another husband. Then, if the other husband divorces her, it is no sin on both of them that they reunite, provided they feel that they can keep the limits ordained by Allâh. These are the limits of Allâh, which He makes plain for the people who have knowledge." [Surat Al Baqarah: 229 -230]. The Glorious Qur'an also explained the rulings of things that happen between the spouses such as Ila' (a husband's oath not to have a sexual intercourse with his wife for a certain period), Zhihar (a man likening his wife to an unmarriageable relative), or Li`an (disprove a charge of adultery made by the husband against his wife). The Glorious Qur'an also mentioned the rights of children, babies, and the obligation of preserving and caring for them. "The mothers shall give suck to their children for two whole years, (that is) for those (parents) who desire to complete the term of suckling, but the father of the child shall bear the cost of the mother's food and clothing on a reasonable basis." [Surat Al Baqarah: 233]. Allah (Exalted be He) says: "O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the Commands they receive from Allâh, but do that which they are commanded." [Surat At-Tahrim: 6].

In general, the Glorious Qur'an cared for the family, and explained the most important rulings and manners. As for the Sunnah, there are hundred examples of details and explanations more than the Qur'an. This makes us feel the great care of Islam to the family and its status, so we have to understand, feel, and to study the rulings of our Shari`ah so that we would worship Allah based on knowledge and fulfill the rights of people. I ask Allah (may He be Exalted) from His Favor and Bounty to make us understand our religion and to teach us what is beneficial, for He is All Hearer, All Responding.

And praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds [i.e., people], and peace be upon you.