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Home / Counsels / Social

My mother is cheating on my father, what should I do?

Prof. `A`ishah Al Hakamy

Published On: 25/11/2015 A.D. - 12/2/1437 H.   Visited: 12268 times     


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Question

 

 

As-Salamu `Alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh (May Allah's Peace, Mercy, and Blessings be upon you!)

I am twenty years old. Several months ago, I dreamt that my mother cheats on my father with someone we know via SMS.

I woke up, sought refuge from Satan, and I became confused because I was confident about my mother and never doubted her.

The dream disturbed and possessed me. From another side, I saw that the behavior of my mother changed suddenly where she changed the password of the mobile, I understood that she wanted some privacy which is one of her rights, however the dream and Satan insinuated to me, so I decided to interpret the dream then I cancelled the idea.

I decided to speak frankly with her and told her that I trust her, but I am very annoyed for thinking badly in her even in my dream.

She understood my words and told me that she has no relationship with that person and that she is proud of me, particularly after my frankness with her; thanks to Allah, I felt comfortable and forgot the matter completely.

After a while, I took her mobile to search for something then I saw a message between her and another person that confirms their relationship.

I was shocked and could not find words to describe my sadness. My mother is my model example, how could she do something like that?

My father is a good person, his good situations are countless, and he does not deserve that.

I spoke to her and explained to her my situation of what I saw. She told me that she had an affair with that person a while ago but she cut the relationship completely, and I was relaxed when I heard that, but I still doubt her.

My treating to her has changed, I became cold with her, did not forget her action, and I feel she is a lair and cheating on my father.

I took the number and thought of calling him but my mind prevents me; could you kindly tell me what to do? Should I do it or not?

May Allah reward you the best


Answer

 

In the name of Allah who guides people to the truth and He is the One whose aid is to be implored. Peace be upon you.

 

Dreams are the way to unconsciousness, Freud said. This means that the dream you saw that night and corrupted your relationship with your mother was just deep fears inside you that your mother would cheat on your father.

 

You were searching for an evidence to prove your doubts, but the origin is not to follow suspicions and not to spy. It was reported in the Hadith: "Beware of suspicion (about others), as suspicion is the falsest talk, do not follow the defects of others, And do not spy." Tahassus means asking for an evidence through senses.

 

So, do not follow suspicions, verily suspicions show you things away from their realities.

 

What happened had happened, and you advised her for the sake of Allah; may Allah reward you the best. Nothing is due on you but admonition and reminding, and leave the matter to your mother and her conscious, reason, and religion, for you are not a guardian over her and you have no power over her. So, do not transgress your limits, do not use her mobile without her permission, and do not let dreams and suspicions move your reality, corrupt your relationship, and disturb your life.

 

How to forget what happened?

By forgiving, pardon, and busy yourself with your own defects and your future.

May Allah guide you and enlighten your insight.

And Allah (Glory be to Him) knows the best.

 



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